Chinese Stories in English
Stories Magazine (Page 09)
Selections from Stories Magazine Compilation #145 《故事会合订本145》上海文化出版社
Page citation and links to online Chinese text noted after each story.
1. A Poor Girl and Money Bamboo 3. No More Condolences 5. Any Lock Can Be Picked
2. Toad Returns a Favor 4. Mike's Ingenious Scheme 6. His Ultimate Strategy
1. A Poor Girl and the Money Bamboo (穷嫁女和摇钱竹)
A Rongzhi (阿荣志)
Once upon a time a family had a sensible and filial daughter named Jade Lin. She reached marriageable age in no time at all, but her family was so poor that no one came around to seek her hand. The family had to resort to a "poor girl marriage", a method devised by poor people to marry off their daughters. They’d give a cow to a girl who was of age, turn it loose and tell her to follow it. When it stopped at a place where people lived, she’d remain there to start a family and the cow would serve as her dowry.
When the time came, Jade’s family gave her their only cow. She bid farewell to her parents and walked away in tears, following the animal into the distance. The old cow walked at a leisurely pace through a village with tall, beautiful buildings, but it didn’t stop there. Soon it passed a village with solid, neatly tiled houses, but it still kept going. Jade walked behind the cow until it came to a cliff, and that’s where it chose to stop.
Jade saw wisps of smoke coming out of the chimney of a hut at the base of the cliff. A handsome young man heard something and walked out of the hut to investigate. When he saw Jade following behind the old cow, he understood right away what was going on. He invited Jade inside at once. That’s how she came to be married to the young man, whose name was Peace Li.
The old cow had picked a good place to stop. Jade saw a pile of gold and silver in a corner when she entered the hut. After they married, Peace built a new home under the cliff and bought a few acres of land. He was a practical and capable fellow, and Jade was skillful and virtuous. The two lived a typical country life, with Peace working the fields while Jade took care of the home.
Strange as it seems, Peace would go out every day and bring back a basket of gold and silver when he returned. One night Jade couldn't contain her curiosity and asked him where he got so much treasure. Peace said he got it by shaking down a flowering bamboo that grew on the other end of the cliff.
He said he’d passed by the bamboo forest one evening and noticed that one of the bamboos was rather unusual. It turned out to be flowering. He walked over and shook it gently, and enough gold and silver fell to the ground to fill his backpack. He picked it all up. From then on, he went to shake the bamboo every evening, and every time he’d get a full pack of treasure.
Peace and Jade didn't know that there was someone eavesdropping outside the door while they were talking. It was Peace's brother, Flat Li. He was a cruel man. After their parents passed away, he drove Peace out of the house, so Peace had to go live under the cliff. Flat came to visit Peace when he heard that Peace had married, but he had an ulterior motive: He wanted to find out how Peace had become so well off. He happened to overhear the secret of the money bamboo and got very excited.
Flat sneaked over to Peace's house again the next morning. He spent the day sleeping in the woods nearby while Peace worked in the fields. In the evening, without making a sound, he scurried behind Peace as he carried his empty backpack to the other side of the cliff. When Peace arrived at the money bamboo and shook it gently, gold and silver immediately clanked to the ground. Peace picked it up and headed home.
As Peace was walking away, Flat hurried over to the money bamboo. He looked up and shook it gently, expecting gold and silver to fall. He got more than he bargained for because what fell from the plant were rocks the size of eggs. They hit him so hard that he was bruised and swollen and howled like a banshee. He ran home crying in pain.
Next morning, a very angry Flat went back to the other side of the cliff with an axe and chopped down the money bamboo. He thought, if I can't live a life of ease, no one else will, either.
Peace didn't yet know what had happened and spent the day toiling in the fields. As usual, he carried a pack to the bamboo forest on the other end of the cliff that evening. He was dumbfounded when he saw that someone had cut down the money bamboo. He sighed as he thought for a while. Then he tidied up a bit and split the felled money bamboo into shorter pieces, which he tied into a bundle to drag back home.
Jade saw the bundled bamboo that Peace dragged home and thought she could use it to make baskets and packs. She got right to it and finished a few baskets in no time. Their hens were layers, so she spread straw in some of the baskets and placed them next to the chicken coop, making nests for the hens to incubate the eggs.
Believe it or not, before long hens from the nearby village all came to Peace's chicken coop to lay their eggs. The coop was empty in the mornings but filled with eggs by evening. Peace's family had more eggs than they could possibly eat.
Flat also kept a hen at his place. He noticed that it hadn’t laid eggs for several days, so he investigated and found that she’d laid all her eggs in Peace's coop.
That shook Flat up. What was going on? What was so special about Peace's chicken coop? He went to see Peace and asked about it. Peace hadn’t prepared an answer and simply told him everything. Flat thought, “This bamboo is magic!” As soon as he figured that out, he ran off to the bamboo forest, cut down a few more bamboo plants and dragged them back to his house.
He closed the door as soon as he got home and started to weave a bamboo basket. As usual, he was better at eating than working and spent half a day weaving just one basket. It was a pretty good one, though. He put straw in the basket and placed it next to his chicken coop. He assumed the basket would soon be full of eggs.
He couldn’t wait to go out to the coop that evening. He was flabbergasted when he saw that the straw had all been thrown out of the basket, leaving nothing but chicken shit in its place....
Chinese text from 故事会合订本#145, p. 2-064. Also available here.
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2. Toad Returns a Favor (金虾蟆报恩)
Shen Gan (沈淦)
Once upon a time, a kind-hearted man called Elder Dong, who came from a relatively wealthy family, spent a lot of his spare time helping his neighbors solve their problems. The people loved him and he accumulated much good karma.
A blackguard named Toad Jin resided in a dilapidated straw hut outside the city in the same county as Elder and his family. He was nearly thirty years old but lived alone, and spent his time wandering around looking for someone to swindle. People avoided him if they saw him coming, except hot-headed types who realized they’d been conned by him. They’d beat him to a bloody pulp and leave his teeth laying on the ground. But what was the use of that? Toad could hardly change his nature -- he always forgot the pain after his wounds healed.
One day Toad was lying in the street, drunk. He stood up in a stupor and bumped into the county magistrate's sedan chair, so the magistrate's men trussed him up like a bunch of cut flowers and took him away. Next morning the locals watched him paraded through the streets in a “standing cage” or “standing shackle”, a cruel torture device that prevented the prisoner from doing anything but stand. The prisoner would often die within a few days. Apparently, the magistrate had finally made up his mind to rid the county of this rogue.
Elder hurried to the magistrate’s office with some money when he heard the news, looking for someone he could pay to intercede on Toad’s behalf. Money can do wonders, as you might expect, and Toad was in fact released within a few days.
The brush with death seems to have changed Toad. He went to Elder's home with incense and candles in hand to express his sincere gratitude. When he saw Elder, he knelt and banged his head on the ground in a traditional kowtow. Elder helped him up and said, "Your skin and bones are gifts from your parents. You shouldn't waste them like this! What are your plans for the future?"
Toad burst into tears. "I’ve fallen into such a state, what can I possibly do? I oughta just die and be done with it!"
"I didn’t go to all that trouble to rescue you just to let you kill yourself." Elder frowned and thought for a moment before asking, "Do you really have no skills? There are so many ways to make a living in this world."
Toad lowered his head and thought for a long time before he replied. “I learned how to make steamed Poria cakes when I was young. My family loved them. But it’d be hard to make a living from it since I don’t have the start-up money for a business.”
Elder stroked his beard and smiled, "That's easy!" Without another word, Elder gave three of his family’s thatched houses to Toad, and equipped them with pots, stoves, steamers and other utensils. He also handed ten strings of copper coins to Toad and told him it was a loan to buy ingredients. He repeatedly warned Toad: "From now on, be a good person and never make the same mistakes again!"
That’s how Toad got in the Poria cakes business, and he’s been at it ever since. His cakes taste great, but at first no one dared buy them. Who wouldn’t rather let a sleeping dog lie? He didn’t lose heart, though. He got up before dawn every day to steam the cakes, then carried them on a pole to sell on the streets. When he passed by the Dong household, he always left a bowl of steaming hot cakes to be served at Elder's bedside. They were so fragrant and soft that Elder felt compelled to sing their praises. He asked Toad to send him a bowl every day as a way to pay off the ten strings of cash he’d borrowed.
Elder made a point of saying nice things about Toad to his neighbors, relatives and friends. Before long people started buying the cakes and found them so delicious that they rushed to buy more. It pleased Elder to see Toad's business booming. He noted that Toad worked his fingers to the bone with no one at home to cook his meals for him, so he betrothed his maidservant, Pearl, to him. Now Toad worked with even more enthusiasm and made the cakes even better.
Toad and his wife opened a shop on a nearby street about a year later and customers crowded in every day. Rain or shine, hot or cold, and no matter how busy he was, Toad of course delivered a bowl of steaming hot Poria cakes to Elder's bedside every morning.
Three years passed before they knew it. Elder felt sorry for Toad having to work so hard, so he told him to stop the daily deliveries. But Toad swore to heaven, "I owe everything I have to my benefactor. As long as I live, I’ll send you cakes every day. May thunder roar and lightning strike me if I don't!" Elder noted his sincerity and let him continue.
In the blink of an eye, Elder had turned seventy. His beard and eyebrows were completely white, but he still had an appetite and lots of energy, just like the immortals of old. Once, he caught a cold and lay in bed for a few days. He only wanted Toad’s Poria cakes to eat and felt everything else tasted bland. Strangely, though, neither Toad nor Pearl had come around for a few days.
Elder pounded his pillow and muttered, "They say there are no filial sons around a long-term sick bed, but I’ve only been sick a couple of days, and those guys have already forgotten me? They’re too heartless and ungrateful!" The more he thought about it, the angrier he became, so he ordered a servant, "Go get Toad. I want to settle up and pay him for the cakes he’s brought me over the past few years!"
When the servant got back, he reported, "What a strange thing, Master! Toad was lying stiff as a board on his bed, like he was dead, but his chest was still kind of warm. Pearl was standing beside him, crying. She said he’s been like that for three days." Elder was shocked and tried go see for himself, but his family stopped him.
Elder felt better the next day. He was about to get out of bed to go see Toad when Toad and his wife showed up to deliver the day’s Poria cakes, plus several more to make up for the cakes they hadn’t delivered the past few days. Elder asked anxiously, "What was wrong with you? It couldn’t have been too serious, since you recovered so quickly."
Toad lowered his head and said nothing, but Pearl replied, "He visited Mount Tai in a dream a couple of weeks ago and met the Divine Lord of the Eastern Peak. To commemorate how Toad had changed his evil ways, the Divine Lord appointed him an Emissary for Death. It didn’t make much of an impression on him after he woke up, until three or four days ago. All of a sudden he lay down, stiff as a board, and didn't get up until the wee hours last night. He said he’d been working as a runner in the netherworld. He’ll spend three or four days there once a month from now on!"
This piqued Elder’s curiosity about the afterlife, but Toad didn't dare say much more, except that he guided people to the netherworld. When Elder asked him what kind of people he’d taken away, Toad answered, "People from all over the world, young and old, good and evil. If their name was on the list, I had to take them, one at a time."
Toad looked worried and hesitant when he came to deliver cakes one day a few months later. Elder kept asking him why, and he eventually admitted, with tears in his eyes, "I received an embossed book from the netherworld yesterday, and your name is third on the list!"
Elder asked in surprise, "Is that true?"
Toad knelt down and kowtowed repeatedly. "How could I dare lie to you about such a thing?" he cried.
But Elder appeared to accept his fate. "As the saying goes, there’s a time to live and a time to die. I’m over seventy and death is inevitable. When will I go?"
"I’m going to a hotel in Chuzhou to pick up a traveler first. It’ll take me about five days to go back and forth. You’ll die at 3:30 in the afternoon on the sixth day."
Elder nodded. "Okay, I understand."
After Toad left, Elder ordered his family to make burial clothes and prepare the coffin. He also invited close relatives and old friends to farewell banquets, where he drank wine and listened to music while waiting for his time to go. He made no bones about his fate and even wore his burial clothes.
Before he knew it, the sixth day had arrived. All his friends and relatives came to see him off. He showed no signs of agitation as he sat in the hall facing his coffin, but his children and grandchildren surrounded him and cried bitterly.
At noon, Elder felt compelled to send his servant to see what Toad was doing. The servant soon reported back that Toad was lying in his house, just like when he went to the netherworld. Elder kept laughing and talking to his friends and relatives and, before he knew it, the sun was going down. He awaited his fate until late that night, and still he hadn’t died. The hall rang with happy laughter as his guests left to go home, but Elder was extremely ashamed. He kept muttering to himself, “What’s that Toad doing?”
Toad came limping to Elder’s home on the morning of the third day after the old man was supposed to die. He was smiling broadly.
"Why’d you break your promise?” Elder asked harshly. “How’d you have the nerve to tease and laugh at someone older than you? What crime should you be punished for?"
Toad fell to the ground and kowtowed. "I broke my promise and embarrassed my benefactor. I’m willing to be punished. Nevertheless, I’m elated that my benefactor has escaped disaster!"
Elder was surprised. "Explain yourself!"
"The King of Hell happened to be out in the world that day,” Toad clarified. “When he passed by the door of your house, he saw you dressed in burial clothes, waiting to die, and knew I must’ve leaked your death date to you. He was furious and sentenced me to one hundred strokes with a club. He asked me why I’d done it, and I told him I was grateful for your kindness in giving me a new lease on life.
“After he heard me tell how you’d treated me so well over the years, the King of Hell checked your record and found that you had indeed done many good deeds. He reported this fact to the Divine Lord of the Eastern Peak and they decided to extend your life."
Elder was overjoyed. "How many more years?” he asked.
Toad replied that he couldn’t hazard a guess at a specific number, only that Elder would live to a ripe old age. To prove he was telling the truth, he rolled up his trouser legs and showed Elder that his thighs were black and blue from the beating. Elder felt very distressed at the sight and burst into tears.
Toad died of illness a few years later, but Elder lived to be 123 years old. He saw his two great-grandsons pass the entrance examination and become students at the county school. He was sitting proudly in the back hall that day, accepting congratulations from relatives and friends, when he suddenly stared at something outside the door. "Oh, Toad is coming!" he shouted before smiling and passing away.
Chinese text from 故事会合订本#145, p. 2-081. Also available here.
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3. No More Condolences (拒绝慰问)
Pang Dong (庞栋)
Old Liu saw a thief stealing a girl's wallet while he was in the city on a job one day. He chased after the thief to try to catch him. The thief had a club hidden on his person and pulled it out and hit Old Liu's wrist. Old Liu didn’t back down and eventually subdued the thief after a fight.
Someone filmed Old Liu's heroic act and posted the video online. The video went viral and Old Liu became an internet celebrity.
One day while Old Liu was at home recovering from his injuries, the Village Director came running over to his place. “Great news, Old Liu,” he exclaimed. “Your heroic deeds have caught the attention of the county government! Two leaders are coming to visit you today to offer their condolences for your injury!"
The first leader arrived shortly thereafter. He shook Old Liu's hand genially and praised him for his bravery. It was the first time Old Liu had received condolences from a leader, and he was so excited that tears welled up in his eyes. The second leader stopped by that afternoon and consoled Old Liu even more enthusiastically.
The next day, the Village Director told Old Liu that a business leader would also be coming to express his sympathy. Old Liu hesitated a moment before asking, "Can I refuse his condolences?"
The Village Director objected. "What do you mean, Old Liu? When the businessman comes to see you, he’ll be able to see the situation in our village. If he sees something he likes and decides to invest here, the whole village will thank you." Like it or not, Old Liu had to agree.
Old Liu was about to relax for a while after enduring the businessman's visit, but the Village Director said that someone else would come to visit that afternoon. He asked Old Liu not to look as sullen as he had that morning.
Old Liu refused to see the guy. "No matter who else comes, I’ll never allow them to console me!"
The Village Director was quite put out. "What's wrong with someone expressing their condolences? It won’t cost you anything!"
Old Liu rolled up his sleeves. With tears in his eyes, he said, "They always brought a camera with them when they came to visit me. When they got in front of the camera, they didn't concern themselves about which wrist I had injured. Once they took hold of my hand, they didn’t stop shaking it, each one harder than the last. It didn't cost me anything, but it sure hurt my wrist!"
Chinese text from 故事会合订本#145, p. 2-091. Also available here.
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4. Mike's Ingenious Scheme (迈克的妙讨)
Zhang Xi (张希)
Mike was elected Administrator of Rock County in a recent election. The governor's "assistance" of course had a lot to do with it.
He didn’t have much time to enjoy the victory, though, because the hassles started almost immediately. Rock County had been in a recession for two years and the coffers were getting low. Mike didn’t know what to do. If things continued that way, his chances in the next election were slim and none.
One day he had an idea. He called his secretary and asked him to draft a plan. "Tell all the county residents that any revenue which is sure to be generated in the future can be collected in advance. For example, property taxes can be collected in advance for as long as the land will continue being used. For revenue that will only possibly be generated in the future, a potion can be collected in advance. If it turns out that too much was collected, the excess will be refunded, or if not enough was collected, the shortfall will be made up." This method would increase fiscal revenues during Mike's term of office.
Mike also convened several meetings of the various government departments and told them emphatically, "My plan must be implemented seriously. I’ll take the lead in collecting the advance payments, and I guarantee that all county residents will be treated consistently.” County Administrator Mike was very satisfied when the plan began to be implemented.
A week later, Mike unexpectedly received a bill for 50% of his heart surgery fee from the county hospital. Mike was confused. He’d never had surgery, so why was he getting a bill? He called the hospital director to find out what was going on. The director smiled and said, "Your heart has never been in good condition, and you may need surgery in the future. You said a portion of possible future fees could be collected in advance, so we billed you for 50% of the cost." Mike thought the explanation made sense, so he paid the bill.
Who could’ve known that Mike would receive another bill two days later, this one from the crematorium for cremation fees. Mike was clearly identified as the cremated person on the bill. County Administrator Mike was quite upset and immediately called the person in charge of the crematorium to complain. That person didn’t take the complaint seriously: " Everyone will die, Mr. Administrator, and you’re no exception. You’ll surely incur a cremation fee in the future, so your regulations require that you pay the money now!"
Translator’s note: Cremation is mandatory in most parts of China. The party hack who wrote this story apparently assumed that’s also true in Western countries.
Chinese text from 故事会合订本#145, p. 2-092. Also available here.
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5. Any Lock Can Be Picked (世上没有打不开的锁)
Xu Shujian (徐树建)
Wide Open Huang had worked in a factory specializing in lock manufacturing since he was a child. He was a senior technician when he retired and opened a small locksmith shop where he also manufactured locks. The locks he made were so solid that no one could pick them, so he made a point of posting a couplet by the shop’s door: “There’s no lock that can’t be picked, but here’s a door that’s locked securely.”
One day Wide Open was in his shop chatting with the owners of some neighboring stores when a man burst in and shouted angrily, "Master Huang, someone picked your lock! You have to compensate me for my loss!"
"Are you sure it was my lock?” Wide Open asked in embarrassment. “Are you sure it was picked and not pried open?"
Still angry, the man replied, "You think I'm a three-year-old kid playing games?"
Wide Open had the man lead him to his house to check out his claim. A few of the neighboring shop owners trailed along to watch the excitement. After a short walk, they arrived at the door of the house where the police were busy collecting evidence. Wide Open took a closer look and gasped. The door was ajar and the lock was intact, and it was undoubtedly one of his locks. It had obviously been opened by a skilled expert.
Wide Open's face turned ashen: "It’s my lock for sure. Don't worry. It’s my responsibility and I won’t try to avoid it."
A neighbor looked at Wide Open and said, "Is there any chance it's not your lock?" Wide Open smiled bitterly. Only he knew that this wasn’t the first time someone had opened one of the locks he’d made. It had happened several times recently.
Wide Open returned to his shop and tore up the couplet he’d posted. He closed down the shop and bowed to his neighboring shop owners. "I’ve smashed my signboard. I’m too embarrassed to keep the shop open. Farewell!" Everyone wanted him to stay open, but his mind was made up.
The shop was still closed several months later. People were panicking because they’d lost so many things in a wave of break-ins. Then someone else rented the location and opened another lock shop.
A burst of earth-shattering firecrackers signaled the reopening. A crowd gathered and was surprised to see that the shop had been redecorated. The couplet by the door had been changed to: “Some locks really can’t be picked, and no thief can get in here.”
It turned out that a very polite young man with a simple and honest face had opened the new store. When people asked him what his couplet meant, he answered modestly but confidently: "No one in the world can pick the locks at my place, not even me."
Wide Open had made boasts as wide as the ocean, that he himself was the only person in the world who could pick the locks he made. This young man went a step further and said that even he couldn't pick his own locks. Everybody shook their heads. “Wide Open failed even though he was highly skilled. An inexperienced fellow like you, still wet behind the ears, your boasts are no more than hot air. Aren't you afraid you’ll attract thieves to challenge you? At the very least, you’re insulting other locksmiths, aren’t you?”
The people in the crowd had guessed correctly. Before long other locksmiths came to challenge the youngster’s boasts. But after many days had passed, no one had been able figure out the mechanism behind his locks.
Everybody in town had endured the invisible threat of petty thievery. But now, just when they were wondering if they could carry on even one more day, things had gotten better: The door god had come! The young man's business took off and residents who installed his locks were delighted to find that thieves really couldn't get in. Thieves were still picking locks and stealing things, but no one who’d installed the young man's locks was burglarized.
His success obviously didn’t satisfy the young man. He posted a challenge on various platforms: "My steel locks are tops in the world. I’m offering a 10,000 yuan reward to anyone who can pick one. You won’t lose anything if you fail to open the lock." This post was like adding fuel to a fire. For a while, it was the number one topic on everyone’s tongues. Lots of challengers came forward, but none succeeded.
The young man smiled triumphantly and continued to increase the reward. When it got up to 50,000 yuan, a strange man came to the shop.
This fellow was as thin as a stick, and he walked lightly, as silently as a cat. Most importantly, he always wore a mask and sunglasses, so his looks couldn’t be discerned. The neighbors couldn't help commenting: "This guy has almost no flesh on his bones. He’s wary of cold and afraid of light, and has more yin than yang. He’s a ghost!"
As they were discussing him, the stranger asked, "Where's the lock? Bring it to me and let me have a go at it." His voice was cold as ice, with nary a trace of warmth. Even the young locksmith couldn’t help but shudder as he brought out a big lock. A crowd gathered around to watch in silence. They had a feeling that something was going to happen that day.
The strange man took the lock and stared at it carefully. He didn’t move a muscle for ten minutes, sitting as still as an old monk.
The crowd got bored, but just as people were starting to yawn, the strange man moved. He opened the toolbox he’d brought with him, and as soon as he did, the crowd gasped. It was a veritable treasure chest containing all kinds of ingenious tools. The tools were small and exquisite, delicate and hard, and all made of pure steel.
The young locksmith's face lost its color. It goes without saying that these tools frightened him. The strange fellow picked out two tools from the box, a hook and a needle. They were as thin as hair and flashed with cold light as he inserted both into the keyhole at once. This guy was clearly superior to the previous locksmiths, who’d only inserted one tool at a time.
Next the stranger put his ear close to the keyhole. He held the lock steady in his left hand and gently turned it with his right.
All was silent. Before long the man pulled his tools out from the lock, but the lock didn't open. Everyone in the crowd had mixed feelings. They wanted the lock to open so they’d have something to talk about; but they also worried that it would open, because the honest young man would lose 50,000 yuan.
Sweat oozed from the stranger's brow, but he didn’t give up. He’d been wearing a pair of gloves as thin as a cicada's wings, but no matter how thin they were, they still inhibited his sense of touch, so he took them off. The crowd was surprised to see how long and thin, how pale and delicate, his fingers were.
The man took out another fine steel tool. This one was even odder than the other two. It forked at the front end, with a small hook on one side and a sharp point on the other. The man put his ear close to the keyhole again, and to everyone’s surprise, he inserted the new tool into the keyhole together with the other two. He only needed five fingers of one hand, plus the three tools crossing like ghostly snakes, to explore and try....
Hours passed before the man pulled out his tools again. No one could see his expression, but the crowd knew from his body language that he was exasperated. He’d failed again. "I lost," he admitted.
He was about to leave when someone behind him called out, "You’ve made a fool of yourself because of your inadequate skills." The strange man stood still, and his entire body trembled as another fellow stepped out from the back of the crowd. Wide Open had appeared again after a long absence.
Wide Open took four tools from his toolbox, one more than the strange man had used! He covered his right hand with his big left hand so that no one could see what he was doing. After a moment, the lock opened with a faint "click".
The crowd’s cheers resounded throughout the area. The strange man's expression still couldn’t be clearly seen, but he was obviously shocked. He bowed and said in a gravelly voice, "I've learned my lesson!"
As the stranger turned to leave, Wide Open drawled, "You still think you can leave?"
The man shuddered. "What do you mean?"
Now Wide Open’s voice was cold. "You don't understand? All you know is burglary, huh? You’re morally corrupt and your crimes stink to high heaven!"
That shocked the crowd. The stranger dodged and tried to run away, but two men pounced on him and pinned him down. They were policemen.
"Stop resisting!” Wide Open sneered. “One of the people living nearby installed a lock that I’d made. You tried to pick it but couldn't, so you took off your gloves for a moment, leaving fingerprints. Do you deny those fingerprints were yours?"
The stranger abruptly collapsed. The policemen removed his sunglasses and mask, revealing a pale and distorted face. "Don’t hurt me, Master,” he pleaded.
Wide Open’s face showed anger and regret. "You can fight against evils sent your way by fate, but you can’t escape the evils you bring on yourself! I’m not the one who’s hurting you; you’ve hurt yourself. You refused to take the path to heaven and insisted on taking the road to perdition!"
They soon learned that the stranger was the suspect in the recent series of burglaries. It turned out he’d been Wide Open's apprentice at the lock factory! He thought the factory didn’t pay enough and, overcome by temptation, used his skills to pick the lock at someone’s home. He got more from that first burglary than he’d expected. Starting from that, he fell further into depravity and changed from a human to a monster.
Wide Open had closed his shop in anger when he saw that his locks were frequently being picked. He went home and threw himself into researching the problem, and in due course he succeeded in developing a new lock. He had his new apprentice, the young man, reopen the shop and lay out a trap for the crook. Eventually the older apprentice took the bait.
The neighbors asked, "Wide Open, aren't you afraid your new apprentice will make the same mistake?"
Wide Open smiled. "All I do now is develop improved locks to sell. I don’t teach people how to pick them anymore. There’s an inherent contradiction between selling locks and picking them – locks are defense and picking them is offense. I choose to be on the defensive side, protecting untold numbers of homes."
Chinese text from 故事会合订本#145, p. 3-006. Also available here.
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6. His True Ultimate Strategy (真正的绝招)
Teng Jianjun (滕建军)
Young Cheng was employed in the small parts shop at Peace Metal Works when the factory manager installed a metal detector at the entrance to keep employees from sneaking in personal projects. Cheng was anxious because he'd just finished a private job for someone, and if he couldn't get it out of the factory, his effort would be wasted, wouldn't it?
One day Cheng was surprised to hear that his coworker, Young Zhao, had somehow managed to smuggle a private job out of the factory. He only half believed it and kept a close eye on Zhao's every move. He noticed that the young man carried a large stainless steel electric kettle to and from work every day, which he claimed was for drinking water. In fact the base of the kettle had been modified to hold small items. The security guard would check the kettle every time it set off the metal detector, but let Zhao pass when he found it contained only water. Cheng adopted this strategy and modified an electric kettle of his own.
As Cheng was leaving the factory with his kettle, secure in the belief that he wouldn’t be caught, the head of security noticed something wasn’t right. He examined the kettle for a moment, pouring out the water and hefting it in his hand. Then he used a screwdriver to remove the base, catching Cheng red-handed. He reported the incident to the director, who decided to punish Cheng severely to make an example of him. He levied a heavy fine on him and reduced his wages to boot.
The director also prohibited anyone from bringing metal kettles into or out of the factory from then on. This of course exasperated Zhao as well. Cheng apologized to his coworker and, to make amends, invited him out for drinks. Pretending to be tipsy, Cheng reluctantly asked Zhao, "You did the same thing. How come you never got caught?"
Zhao, smelling of booze, answered disparagingly. "You just copied what you saw me do. You never stopped to think about my real strategy, so of course you got caught!"
Cheng straightaway encouraged Zhao to down a few more shots. Then he asked sheepishly, "So, just what was the secret of your success?"
Slurring his words, Zhao answered, "First, you hafta give … the chief o’ security … a token o’ your gratitude … t’get him on board!"
Chinese text from 故事会合订本#145, p. 3-096. Also available here.